Here's a little update on how things have been going for us since our big move a month ago:
For some reason, at the very beginning of the year I felt as though God had some sort of 'trial' or 'difficult learning experience' for us this year. Being the hypochondriac I am, I immediately assumed it meant cancer and death for me. Thankfully, so far at least, those things have not been in the picture. I know God never gives us more than we can handle, and I definitely would not trade our problems for anyone else's, but I had no idea how difficult this year would be. I especially didn't think Arkansas would be this years' antagonist!
As you may know, Drew has been traveling back and forth to Arkansas since April of this year. This was completely out of left field. It isn't something we asked for; it isn't something we wanted. Nevertheless, it happened. Drew was gone more than he was home every month. It was very hard on Jude; he started getting really clingy and having complete breakdowns if Drew or I even just left the room. It was very hard on me in just about every way possible. If it weren't for my parents, sister, friends, and Jude's babysitter, I'm pretty sure I would have lost it. I admit, I definitely had a few breakdowns. Tears were a recurring theme this year. We attended a church near the air force base in Omaha so similar situations happened to friends of ours, and I cannot imagine how difficult military wives have it when their spouses are deployed for months, even years at a time! Hands down, they are some of the strongest women in the world.
The travel schedule was increasing each month and Drew was continually being asked if he'd be willing to relocate to Arkansas. Uh...absolutely not!!! OMAHA is our home! That's where our family is! Our whole support system! Our beloved church! Our house! Finally, they stopped asking.
Fall was approaching and Drew was facing more trips away. I finally just had a complete nervous breakdown and bawled my eyes out to him. I couldn't take it anymore and for the first time I think Drew finally understood how hard his work schedule was on our family (don't get me wrong; Drew was supportive and helpful throughout this whole ordeal. It was crazy hard on him too! He was being pulled in four different directions at once and I think we'd both reached a breaking point.). We both knew that something had to change. We both felt it; like God was telling us something was going to happen. I just thought it meant Drew wouldn't have to travel anymore and would get to do the job he actually wanted. I guess I was partly right, haha.
The question came again. "Drew, what is it going to take to get you to relocate to Fort Smith, Arkansas for the next 12-18 months?" I believe that was the exact question that was posed. I was on the way to see a movie with my friend Ciara (who was also in the 'husband-is-away' boat with me) when Drew called me to chat and told me what was asked of him. Both of us had the same words coming out of our mouths (No way! Not ever!), all the while both feeling in our hearts, "I think we're supposed to say 'yes' to this." By the end of the conversation, we decided this was it; we were waving the white flag and giving in. We both immediately felt like a weight was lifted off of our shoulders.
After lots of stress and tears...here we are. In Arkansas. The actual move wasn't terrible. The company relocated us so I didn't have to pack a single box (which was absolutely ideal because I don't know if I could have emotionally handled packing up our perfect house in Omaha). Unpacking is always overwhelming but I really don't have anything to complain about. That's life! If a box is packed, it will eventually have to be unpacked. Apparently though I was under more stress than I realized because for the second time in my life (the first being when my body was under the stress of being 36 weeks pregnant), I got shingles. Ugh. So...much...pain! Like the first time, it affected my back, which was NOT helpful trying to unpack and lift heavy things.
*For those of you who have been blessed enough to not have experienced shingles, for me this is how it feels: severe body aches like the flu + the feeling of a really large bruise + the 'sensitive to the touch' feeling of a bad sunburn + extreme fatigue = shingles on Lauren's back.*
Fortunately I had some meds left over from the first bout so I was able to heal fairly quickly. I wasn't the only one who had health issues when we moved; Drew caught a severe cold and Jude, we discovered, cannot tolerate the tap water here (horrible digestive issues are the result) so he is exclusively on bottled water. We tried introducing britta filtered water, but it still causes 'yuckies' so bottled it is for the lad!
As of now, we are probably 90% settled in terms of unpacking (the garage is still a hot mess), and all health issues have ceased (for now at least). Drew loves his job and is having great success at it (like that was a surprise....Drew's the best at what he does!). Judes' temperament has improved significantly! It is definitely noticeable that he feels much more at ease knowing daddy comes home every single night. I think its noticeable in all of us: we're a family again. It. Is. Wonderful.
I'll be perfectly honest; I still have a difficult time with things. I am beyond thankful that our awesome little family is together, and I still feel that God wanted us to make this move and I'm happy that we did, but this is harder than I expected.
I'm a stay at home mommy and I love it, but it also makes it more difficult to not feel 'alone'. In Omaha, I would go out with my mom, my sister, my friends, and there were numerous places to go and so many fun things to do! Not to be a pessimist, but there just isn't anything here. I know the people aspect of everything will take time and that's ok! We've already made a few friends and we've found a great church and small group to attend so I'm sure many more new friends are right around the corner. **Brief side note: how did we find a church we love so quickly? Our neighbor is the college pastor. Go ahead and try to say that isn't just straight up a "God thing" :)**
The whole 'things to do' aspect of Fort Smith is a little more challenging. When we ask people what there is to do around here, most people list things that are two to three hours away. The people who don't give us that answer are the ones that say, "Well...there really isn't much to do here." Alrighty then!
Fort Smith is much smaller than Omaha, obviously, but it really is a sweet little town with lots of potential! I've said to a few people that I feel like I need to go to a city council meeting because there are so many things that could happen here that just aren't. I've been told that the 'powers that be' in this town are kind of stuck in their ways and do not like change. Oh well, it is what it is. I do have to say that boutique shopping Omaha vs. Fort Smith.... point Fort Smith! Seriously girlfriends, come down and go shopping with me :).
Culturally it's been a bit of a shock. There have been many times that Drew and I have literally had to ask people, "What is this? Is this a 'thing' here?" For example; half the town is closed on Sunday (not bad, just different), a 15% tip at a restaurant is extravagant, and don't even get me started on the term "y'all" haha. Even the grass is different here than in Omaha! Oh and going back to shopping; any of my Omaha girls tell me what a 'piko' is? This was a new experience for me but pikos are a fashion staple in the south! I bought a couple. They're nice! I think we should start that being 'a thing' up north.
I still get down every once in a while. I am blessed to have many people and places to miss in Omaha. I'll be honest, it doesn't feel like 'home' here yet. In my experience though, that feeling sort of sneaks up on you and you don't even realize it until it's time to leave. That's my hope. That not only will we be moving back to Omaha after these 18 months, but that we will have many places and loved ones to miss when we do.
If God brings you to it, He'll help you thru it. I know He wants better things for us than we can even fathom. It'll be interesting and exciting to see what that looks like.
If I may, a few things that we could use prayer for:
1. Me possibly getting a part time job. (Just for something to do! This would obviously effect Jude a great deal so he obviously is the number one thing to consider in this decision.)
2. Friends for all of us.
3. Comfort in times of stress and loneliness (and when we're feeling super homesick).
4. Continued success in Drew's career.
5. Opportunities for God to use us here in FSM.
6. Jude's tummy issues.
7. Holiday travels.
Thank you so much.
Lastly, here is my message to Omaha:
Love y'all
(haha)
Lauren
