So where were we?
My last post talked about how I had to start maternity leave two weeks earlier than expected and the worries that resulted...God provided and we're doing well.
So baby just kept dropping lower and lower during my maternity-leave-without-baby. I spent two weeks in bed, couldn't walk, watching "Roseanne" marathons on T.V. The pain was bad but the worst part was the boredom. Hardly anything to complain about though! I'm sure that'd sound like a vacation to some people :). Anyway, I learned a lot about parenting from Roseanne.
When I wasn't in bed, I was traveling to the doctor to see if I was anymore dilated/effaced. The answer was always 'no' and the pain just kept getting worse. My doctor told me to try some Evening Primrose Oil capsules on a Friday appointment and we'd see if I'd progressed any by my Monday appointment...if I had progressed, she'd have us induced on that following Friday. If I hadn't progressed, she'd let me go a week past my due date---AAAHHH! I knew I couldn't take that! I took that EPO like it was going out of style. That Monday we got the good news that there was indeed progress! Praise the Lord!!! The doc also gave us the news that instead of being induced that Friday, we'd be induced that Thursday (our actual due date)! We got all geared up to be back at the hospital at 6am, Thursday, February 21.
This left me with three whole days to f-r-e-a-k o-u-t. The most common stories (on google, that is, haha) of being induced involve labor lasting two days, pitocin contractions being waaaay stronger than normal ones, pitocin competing with epidural leading to an emergency c-section. Basically everything that scared me and plagued my mind. What was this going to feel like? I've never given birth before!!! Did I have everything ready? What else do I need? How long will this take? What if I can't get an epidural? What if something goes wrong and baby gets hurt? What if I'm not a good mom? What if I literally get split completely in half like a wishbone??? (Ok that one is a little much...) Anyway...point being: Me=spazzing.
Thursday morning alarm goes off at 4:00am. Past the point of no return... that was the weirdest morning of getting ready I've ever had. Being scared like something bad was going to happen, but being excited because the result was going to be the most wonderful thing ever. We loaded up the car and were on our way. "Snowmageddon" was supposed to happen later that day, but at 5:30am, there wasn't a snowflake around. We drove past a Walmart and I couldn't believe how packed the parking lot was! Snow paranoia had set in the whole city, I guess. (Later on in the day we'd see out the window that everything was completely covered in a beautiful blanket of pure white snow. Loved it.)
We got to the hospital, checked in, and were escorted to our L&D room. Everything was so...weird. It was completely dead at the hospital (we were only one of three women who were giving birth there that day) so we immediately had three nurses jumping to help us get all settled in. They were the night shift L&D nurses and they'd be off soon and boy was I thankful. One of the nurses was so rude and treated me like I was an idiot. She checked my cervix and rolled her eyes and sighed and told me that I was going to be there for a while. Yeah....a real peach. I was thrilled when she left.
The one nurse that stayed until the day nurse came was really nice. She got me hooked up to my I.V. and started the pitocin. Then my day L&D nurse came in and she was the best possible nurse I could have had. Her name was Dana and she was fabulous. She laughed with us, talked with us, and made the whole process so much less scary.
By 8:00am my doctor came in to break my water. I thought that'd hurt really bad but it didn't at all. It was extremely weird though! There's just something about seemingly 'wetting the bed' that makes you feel like a jerk or something. My doctor encouraged me after she examined my progress by letting me know that I was further along than she'd expected and would probably have the baby around 5:00pm that night. I was so happy I wasn't going to be in labor for days!
After a while, Dana said it was time to walk some laps in the hallway to make my contractions stronger. First lap around the hallways: ouch...so that's what a baaaad contraction feels like. Second lap: holy crap...I stopped back in the room and told Dana they were getting really bad. She said, "Great!!! Keep walking!" Third lap: couldn't take it anymore! Went back to the room, Dana checked to see how dilated I was and pronounced me eligible for an epidural :)! Yay! She got the anesthesiologist and I got juiced up (getting the epidural was one of the most painful events, but still not terrible). The contraction pain almost immediately went away and I was feeling good. Drew, Mom, Dana, and I talked and joked and had a grand old time. Drew and Mom went to get something to eat and Dana told me I should really take a nap. I'd only gotten about 4 hours of sleep the night before but I still felt great. I shut my eyes, Dana went on break, and another nurse came to fill in. I didn't have much shut-eye because I started feeling my contractions on my right side again.
When Dana, Drew, and Mom came back (by this time, Kati had come as well), my pain had gotten pretty bad and they called in the anesthesiologist again to give me a 'boost'. It didn't really work and Dana said that she was going to check my cervix again because that was a sign that things were progressing fast. Yup! Before I knew it she said I was at 10 cm! She called my doctor and she couldn't believe it! She came in to see me and said "You are a rockstar!" So here I am, ready to push... ah here it goes.
Sidenote: In mental preparation for giving birth, I'd decided that logically, it made sense to push your brains out to make things go really fast and to potentially avoid becoming a human wishbone. I decided I was going to be the best pusher they'd ever seen.
Started pushing about 1:45pm and whereas I had the epidural and wasn't feeling as much as I could have, I think I felt more than I should have. A coworker of mine said when her sister gave birth all natural, she concentrated on keeping loose and relaxed during contractions: that didn't work for me. I tried staying loose, gripping something really tight, and nothing worked. The thing that did work for me? Making ridiculous 'strong man competition' faces. I knew I looked stupid but it helped me! Drew said it was all he could do to not laugh at me. Whatevs. Haha.
Here I am, pushing as hard as I can, Drew holding my leg on one side, Dana on the other. There are two awkward spotlights pointed towards the 'action' and they made me way too hot so I asked Kati if she'd please fan me. It felt like an absurd diva demand but she was like, "Of course!" and I was in pain. So there.
Pushing that baby head past my pelvic bone almost killed me. Pretty soon though, the doctor said, "Just one more push!" and he was out! He came out wiggling his head with excellent neck control and the doctor said that was why I was in so much pain leading up to labor, haha.
Before I knew it, I had my beautiful son in my arms. He didn't look all gross like some of the babies 'fresh out' looked on television, he was pretty clean! I counted his little fingers and toes. He was perfect. He was wonderful. He was finally out!
Jude Rain Schneider was born at 3:13 pm, February 21, 2013. 20.5 inches long, 8 lbs 2 oz. 100% the best thing that has ever happened to us.
(Jude at 9 days old)
He's so good. Too good. So good that I worry that he's too good....waiting for the 'catch'. My friend told me that my pregnancy was the catch. Haha.
Now my life is all about him and I couldn't love it more. Yes, I worry a lot...probably more than I should- "Is he breathing???" (I ask that way too much I'm sure. I've lost a lot of sleep staring at him making sure he was breathing. It probably doesn't help that before you leave the hospital they make you watch the scariest video ever on SIDS.)
Things are going very well so far. Just getting used to life with Jude, breastfeeding, and hopefully not having to go back to work! That is something you can pray for us about. Drew was able to have two weeks off for his paternity leave. He goes back to work tomorrow :(. I'll probably be a crying mess. It's been so nice having so much help! He's seriously the best dad ever. He gets up with Jude in the middle of the night more often than most dad's do I'm sure!
I can't imagine life without Jude now. I can't believe I lived without him! We've never felt so 'whole' than we do now as parents. God has blessed us with exactly the best child ever for us. We are so thankful.
I'm looking forward to Jude being able to see us clearly and smile at us :). He smiles a lot already so I'm hoping those won't be in short supply! (He gets that from his mommy :D)
I'm dreading when he's older and tells me he hates me for the first time. I'm pretty sure that'll kill me.
The memory of how horrible my pregnancy was has definitely faded. I don't think you ever forget completely. I personally just don't care how bad it was anymore. It was well worth it. I do occasionally miss him being in my tummy. The first time I laid in bed at home and rolled over on my stomach I about cried. "He used to be in there and I couldn't do this before!" I watch him wiggle so much and I remember what it felt like inside of me. I hope I never forget that feeling. I treasure everything about this experience now.
Anyway, Jude needs mommy right now so I'd better wrap this up. It was extra lengthy this time for my own benefit of remembering and documenting details.
Love, Lauren
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